Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Point - Counterpoint (Back to School Edition)

Point: I wonder what those high school boys are doing on the back of the bus.
Those boys at the back of the bus sure are laughing hard and making a lot of noise. I wonder if they have the new Pokémon game or maybe one of them has cute puppy pictures on their cell phone. Oh well, I should just go back to thinking about daffodils and sunny days. La la la.
Oh my! What was that words one of those high school boys just said? I have never heard such a word before, but coming from his moth at such a loud volume, it must be something really special. Maybe he is declaring his love for his girlfriend. I have seen him and a high school girl kissing under the bleachers at a football game. It was only on the lips though and then he poked her in the stomach and she squealed before my mom told me not to stare. If I had a boyfriend, I wouldn’t kiss him--that’s gross. I would play my little ponies with him and then bake butter cookies in my easy bake oven.
Being a whole 6 years older than me, those boys must know a lot about the world from how to kiss to how to have lots of friends to how to make a really good snowman. Maybe I should turn to see what all the noise is about so those boys can teach me how to have so much fun.

Counter-point: Look at my cock, little girl.
I fucked your mother last night and she was screaming out my name over and over. She also yelled she wished you were never born and she was going to divorce your father. My dick is huuuuuuge and I go all night, little girl.
You see, when I use this dong to have sex with your mother or your older sister, they beg me for more and more. You can probably hear it when you’re trying to get to sleep at night. Chris, take a picture of this gorgeous cock with your cell phone. Hell yeaaaaa!
I see those tears in your eyes, but I know you can’t look away. And, little girl, the bus driver won’t help you because I'm fucking her too. I’m a fuuuuuuucking machine. But don’t be; I’ll fuck you too, the minute you hit puberty.

1 comment:

  1. I'm going to ignore all the content of this post because it makes me uncomfortable and aroused (does that make me a bad person Jesus?). I will say, however, that I'd really like a Hello Kitty backpack, much like our featured protagonist.