Monday, April 30, 2012

Fuck Your Couch!

Okay, so all of these crazy ramblings I'm about to write are entirely truthful and not meant to be funny.  You guys don't have to respond or even read this if you wish.  I just feel like by posting this and letting my friends and family know, I might be more motivated to do all this.

I have had somewhat of a realization over the past few weeks not unlike the first time I watched The Big Lebowski while high.  Only this time I'm totally clearheaded and I think it's time for me to make some major life changes.  It's some sort of fucking miracle that I'm alive and I need to do something with my life other than just get drunk all the time and avoid people.

I have to be healthier.  This means no more caffeine and actually eating the salads my mom makes.  I need to cut back on my alcohol consumption.  Only in moderation and on special occasions when there's people around.  Friday is not a special occasion.  I have got to exercise more as well.

I need to think more positively, stop being so selfish, and work on being more social.  I am beginning to think that just avoiding situations that make me nervous means I'll never be able to learn and grow out of my behavior.  I know this sort of thing takes time but you gotta be in it to win it.

I'm going to quit the whole smoking thing.  Immediately.  I think this is the most important thing.  I'll feel better, live longer, and save lots of money.  I'll have to replace this behavior with something more constructive.  I plan on reteaching myself guitar and playing BG totally obsessively until I'm over it.  If the next time you guys see me I'm still smoking then you're allowed to yell at me and reference this post.

Thanks for reading.

Thursday, April 12, 2012

What is an Auflauf?


There will be a beverage service.
There will be a beverage service.
There will be a beverage service.
There will be a beverage service.
There will be a beverage service.
There will be a beverage service.
There will be a beverage service.
There will be a beverage service.
There will be a beverage service.



Oh hi Mark. We seriously to remake another news report this summer. Tommy has the vidya equipment. I have a newspaper. Youtube Gold. That's smart.

Sincerely,
Joey Waalkes
Inventor of the Merry Christmas Deathray:
For Cheery Holiday Destruction

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Shaq Week Is Over


Shaq Week is now over and it was a great success!  We raised 9 dollars, just one dollar short of our goal!  I have sent the money to Shaq who gratefully accepted it and then slam dunked right in my face.  REJECTED!  Any way, with all of your help we have done our part in raising awareness of the greatest practitioner of Shaq Fu on Earth!  Shaquille O'Neal.  Thank you and may Shaq always watch over you.

Monday, April 2, 2012

It's Shaq Week

Welcome to Shaq Week!  Since Chicken Week went so well 2 years ago and Tommy has expressed an interest in Shaq, I've decided to try another theme week.  Until next Monday April 9th, 2012 all posts and comments must be Shaq related in hopes to raise awareness and support for Shaq, the most underrated player in the NBA.  Feel free to discuss how Shaq only makes half his free throws or how he doesn't like Kobe.  Hopefully with your support Shaq will visit and endorse AIRARHCC.  Thank you and may Shaq always shine down on you from Mt. Olympics where he sits with Hashoop, Heesh, and Hexprak.