Monday, November 30, 2009

Meet My New Friend

Today at work a coworker gifted me with the lovely face you see below.

His Uncle made this a long time ago, although he does not remember making it. Additionally, it is not his Uncle's normal artistic medium. He normally does 50s inspired paintings. There is one problem however, it does not have a name. So I'm holding a naming contest. If I select the name you have chosen, then you'll get a prize (I haven't decided yet what it is, although I suppose it will depend on the winner). Bonus points for historical names, i.e. names of real demons or monsters from history, especially if they come from the Ancient Near East. Also, if you can work in some association with goats and/or pigs (since it looks a little like both) that's bonus too. Each contestant can submit up to two names. All entries must be submitted by December 17th. Happy hunting!

An Online Petition

Well, my online petition to get Hangin' With Mr. Cooper back on the air failed to get Hangin' With Mr. Cooper back on the air. I think it's time to wade into more important political territory. This is the online petition to change Lulu's name to Louis Louis. This is most definitely history in the making.

As many of you may already know, Louis Louis is a dog. I've always had trouble taking Louis Louis seriously. What with all the barking and lollygagging. I mean c'mon. Shut the fuck up! I'm trying to sleep here! But just recently it occurred to me that Louis Louis is hard to take seriously with a name like Lulu. If Louis Louis is ever going to make it in the world of Politics/Jazzercise, she needs a new alias: Louis Louis.

The name Louis Louis encompasses all notable Louis' from any time or place in the Universe. There were 20 or so French kings named Louis many of which were disliked but that's fine because they had power and they changed the World, much as Louis Louis is doing as we speak. If this petition is a success, Louis Louis will finally gain the respect and power she deserves. I hear Mars doesn't have a president yet. Louis Louis' experience chasing squirrels and howling at the moon makes her a prime candidate for the job. Need a job done around the house? Louis Louis will poop on it. I'm even considering buying her a doggie sweater. Remember God is dog spelled backwards and siuol siuol is Louis Louis spelled backwards. So please sign my petition for your future Martian Overlord: Louis Louis.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

The Top Ten Albums of the Last Decade - #9

9. Spoon - Girls Can Tell
How can you beat memories of listening to this cd on the way to GPF shows with a carfull of musicians and a trunk full of instruments? Running through fields of flowers while listening to walking on sunshine? No. Ice skating to Ice Ice, Baby? Absolutely not. The truth is GPF would probably have been arguing about setlists the whole way to their shows if it wasn't for this cd. They probably would have broken up after only a few shows, so Kyle could join The Broken Toys or something, and the world would be a darker place without hits like Young Grasshopper. The truth is spoon has more consistent and rocking pop songs than almost any band this decade and this record showcases them at their finest. It is pretty impossible to still be in a bad mood after listening to this record in its entirety.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

The Sounds Set List: Seattle 2009

I saw The Sounds live here in Seattle on October 27th. Here's their set list for anyone interested:

1. Queen of Apology (Dying to Say this to You)
2. No One Sleeps While I'm Awake (Living in America)
3. Hurt You (Dying to Say this to You)
4. Midnight Sun (Crossing the Rubicon)
5. Rock 'n Roll (Living in America)
6. Night After Night (Dying to Say this to You)
7. 4 Songs and a Fight (Crossing the Rubicon)
8. My Lover (Crossing the Rubicon)
9. Beatbox (Crossing the Rubicon)
10. Dorchester Hotel (Crossing the Rubicon)
11. Painted by Numbers (Dying to Say this to You)
12. Ego (Dying to Say this to You)

Tony the Beat (Dying to Say this to You)

The Top Ten Albums of the Last Decade - #10

10. Death Cab for Cutie - Transatlanticism
The album is epic in its longing, kickass in its intricate and smart lyrics and multicultural in its focus on world travel. This is one of those albums you can listen to again and again and appreciate something new in the feeling that you are being transported to another country full of new people and fascinating culture. So, rev up your motor scooters it's time for a new beginning. The only bad part is I really want to help that bird out and get him untangled from that string.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Tommy and Friends Episode IV Ideas

So here is my rough idea for Tommy and Friends Episode IV: Ceaser Crosses the Rubicon

Tommy is busy playing mario party when Pa walks upstairs and demands that Tommy needs to stop playing and go feed his sea turtle. "How is Tiger supposed to reproduce and help me start my sea turtle farming business without it's alfalfa sprouts?" Pa asks. Tommy is about to get into the hot tub on the cruise ship with peach and toad and says he doesn't even like the stupid sea turtle anyway. Pa gets angry and takes away Tommy's Atari Jaguar for a week.

The next day at school, Tommy is still mad at Ma and Pa for taking away his video game system. So, he talks to the sea lion stuffed animal in his backpack and comes up with a plan to get even with Ma and Pa.During a spelling test in Ms. Trollbottom's class, Tommy gets up and says he has to go to the bathroom. His teacher says he has to hold it until the spelling test is over. Tommy walks over to another student's backpack and pees in it.

Next, in principal Alex Slogger's office, Tommy says he learned how to do this from his parents who pee all over everything in the house on a regular basis after drinking a lot of liquids from bottles. The principal asks Tommy a few questions to which Tommy makes up a bunch of bad stuff that Ma and Pa do to him.

The police arrive at Ma and Pa's house and take them away in handcuffs charging them with neglect and abuse. Tommy goes to live with a wholesome christian family who eats sandwiches for dinner and does not allow video games, but requires mandatory folk tale sign-along time after dinner. Tommy hates it there and runs away into the woods where he declares that he has to get Pa and Ma out of jail because at least they were better than this family.

Tommy hatches some crazy mission impossible shit, similar to the first episode, in order to trick everyone and sneak into jail cell and free Ma and Pa. As they are trying to escape, they release the police dogs (Lulu and Muffin) on them and Tommy has to fight them off with his kinex sword. Then Tommy gets bit by one of the dogs and turns into a werewolf and the episode ends with Tommy running into the woods and howling.

I'm definitely open to suggestions. I'm sure there are some ways we could make this better and I dunno if the peeing thing is too much or if the werewolf thing is too random.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

I shall call you...the Baconator

Greetings friends and enemy (glare)! I've been lamenting the loss of my car since moving to Seattle. I need a mode of transportation that is both portable (i.e. I don't need to rent garage/parking spaces for it) and cheap (no gas hogs [pun intended]). I looked at mopeds, bikes, tricycles, segways, and piggy-back rides from strangers [more intentional puns]. But nothing fit my needs, that is, until I discovered the Baconator out back behind an Asian bistro.

It was love at first sight. It runs on 14 delicious pigs. They both power the car and provide delightful entertainment. Captain Piggles is especially eloquent and well informed on current events. We have had many enlightening discussions on philosophy, religion, politics, and whether Jesus rode dinosaurs (see answer below). Who needs satellite radio when you have intellect of Captain Piggles and the beautiful voices of MC Hammore and Pjork to tickle your ears. I picked up this beauty for the low cost of 15 cats, which I collected from my neighbors without their consent. I know they are going to a better place. The advantages of the Baconator are many: A) If I'm ever stranded and hungry I can cook one of the delicious pigs on the engine to survive; B) It is totally green, in the sense that the only pollutants emitted by my vehicle are green pig poop; C) Everyone gives me space on the road because they are afraid they will get swine flu from the Baconator; D) If attacked by an overweight, overall-wearing Italian plumber & friends you can fling bacon at them from your skillet.

And that's how I spent my summer vacation, by Alexander Ishmael Wojohoski.


Saturday, November 7, 2009

The Leftovers

So this has been a music extravaganza. In composing my Electroween mix there were a lot of cool (in my opinion) electro songs that couldn't make it. Here's a mix with some of the neat songs I discovered. It's not Halloween related although there are some songs that are remixes of songs on my Halloweeen 2 mix. I have a two recommendations for anyone listening to this mix. One, when listening to "Confused Phantom" it's best to shout "Confusion!" really loudly (because you're wearing headphones and don't have proper volume control over your voice) at work and have all your co-workers stare at you. Also, use this as a facebook status or tweet and no one will know what you're talking about and send you concerned emails asking if you are okay. Two, I don't know why but about 2:50 minutes into "DVNO" it all sounds like meowing to me. I know it's probably not, but I like to pretend some hard core kitties got into the mix. Oh, and a note. The voiced sampled in the song by Starfucker, a northwestern based band who's recently changed their name to Pyramid, is from an audio lecture given by Alan Watts. I hope you enjoy.

Leftovers 2009:
1. Arcade Robot by Boys Noize
2. Somnambulistic by Information Society
3. Bring it On by Goose
4. Cocotte by Teenage Bad Girl
5. Paranoia (Pirate_Robot_Midget_Remix) by Video Villain
6. I'm not Scared by Ladytron
7. Sleep Deprivation by Simian Disco Mobile
8. Confused Phantom by Justice Vs. New Order
9. Surf Solar by Fuck Buttons
10. Isabella of Castle by Starfucker
11. Clean (BK Alternativ Instrumental) by Depeche Mode
12. Engine by LA Priest
13. Youre Out (Frankmusic Remix) by Dead Disco
14. Are you the One? by The Presets
15. Out There On the Ice by Cut Copy
16. DVNO by Justice
17. Battle Royal by Does it Offend You, Yeah?
18. Road to Recovery by Midnight Juggernauts
19. Wayfarer by Kavinsky
20. Take Me Into Your Skin by Trentemøller

Monday, November 2, 2009

Halloween Part 3

Merry fucking Christmas you filthy animals! Or whatever. Anywho, here's my Halloween-esque mix for your enjoyment. It is composed of songs that I considered, but rejected for a variety of reasons. Usually because the tone wasn't quite right or the lyrics didn't match the mood.

Halloween-esque 2009:
1. The Ghost by I Love You But I've Chosen Darkness
2. Heads Will Roll by Yeah Yeah Yeahs
3. Magic by Ladyhawke
4. Suicide by Raveonettes
5. I'm a Ghost by Ted Leo & the Pharmacists
6. White Shade by Lukestar
7. Dear Sons and Daughters of Hungry Ghosts by Wolf Parade
8. Ghost Mouth by Girls
9. Of Moons, Birds & Monsters by MGMT
10. So Haunted by Cut Copy
11. Skeleton Key by Margot & The Nuclear So and So's
12. Scarecrow by +/-
13. Cities beneath the Sea by Gravenhurst
14. Ghosts by Lightning Seeds
15. Padding Ghost by Dan Deacon
16. Skeletons by Locust Avenue
17. Fax of Death by The Laurel Collective
18. Bloodsport (109 Mix) by Official Secrets Act
19. Death by Everybody Uh Oh
20. Fear of Drowning by British Sea Power