Sunday, March 29, 2009

Summer 2008 Rum and Coke Mix

During summer of 2008 in a more innocent time before 9/11, I was living in a 14 room nursing home. At night, I could turn up the music as loud as I wanted because I was the only one there. This is what I was listening to:

Drinking in a cramped 1 bedroom with an awesome view of some powerlines, I first heard this song on Phil's play list. He had no idea where it came from.
Lauryn Hill: Lose Myself

I heard of Lemon Jelly first from Phil listening to the song "Nice Weather For Ducks" in his car on the way to Sonic. Although there are no ducks specifically mentioned in this song, I'm sure Phil will find some way it relates to ducks.
Lemon Jelly: Stay With You

Somehow this song fits the morning routine. I have since become a big fan of MGMT. I will forever associate the song "Kids" with the book "The Road."
MGMT: Destrokk

This song reminds of the time the band's bus had a blow-out and we spent the night in Wichita. -98 degrees. Ronnie Van Zant, Greg T. Walker and 3 huskies didn't make it.
Gnarls Barkley: Going On

For some reason this track reminds me of the Special Olympics.
M83: We Own The Sky

I downloaded the whole Gorillaz Repertoire at the beginning of the summer. This song will forever remind me of my brothers and I scrubbing the shit out of the floor with a Mr. Clean sponge. We never did get those marks up...
Gorillaz: O Green World

Hopefully, this week I'll have a chance to get these songs up for download. Check back.

Friday, March 20, 2009

My Playlist

Learning To Fly - Tom Petty/Pink Floyd
Into The Great Wide Open - Tom Petty
The Sky Above, The Field Below - Explosions In The Sky
We Own The Sky - M83
Over The Hills And Far Away - Led Zeppelin
Return To Hot Chicken - Yo La Tengo
Great Southern Land - Icehouse
Terra Nova - I Like Trains

First Breath After A Coma - Explosions In The Sky
Wake Up - The Walkmen
Revenge Wears No Wrist Watch - The Walkmen
Everyone Who Pretended To Like Me Is Gone - The Walkmen
So Long, Lonesome - Explosions In The Sky
Welcome, Ghosts - Explosions In The Sky

Testing - CKY
The Purple Bottle - Animal Collective
A Rush of Blood to the Head - Coldplay
Disengage the Simulator - CKY
Tripping Billies - Dave Matthews
Beautiful World - Coldplay
Title and Registration - Death Cab
Black and White Town - Doves
Clocks - Coldplay
Another Brick in The Wall - Pink Floyd
Life on a Chain - Pete Yorn
Bouncing Around The Room - Phish
California Dreaming - The Mama's and The Papa's

Beautiful Day - U2
Island In The Sun - Weezer
Beach Party Tonight - Yo La Tengo
Swingin' - Tom Petty
Losing A Whole Year - 3rd Eye Blind

What is Love - Haddaway
Cupid's Choke Hold - Gym Class Heroes
Smiley Faces - Gnarls Barkley
I Heard You Looking - Yo La Tengo
Only In Dreams - Weezer

TV - TV on The Radio
Huddle Formation - The Go Team
We Are Not The Football Team - Minus The Bear

In Circles - Sunny Day Real Estate
Lost In The Supermarket - Afghan Whigs/ The Clash
Don't Cry Out - Shiny Toy Guns
Closing Time - Semisonic
Let's Talk About Spaceships - Say Hi To Your Mom

Storms - The Appleseed Cast
New York This Morning - Roman Candle
Glass, Concrete, and Stone - David Byrne
Standing Outside A Broken Phone Booth With Money in My Hand - Primitive Radio Gods
Umbrella - Rihanna
Why Does It Always Rain On Me? - Travis

Weekends of Sound - 764 Hero
Forever Young - Alphaville
You Were the Long Way Home - 764 Hero
Mercy Kiss - Abandoned Pools
The Last Day Of Summer - The Cure

Can't Hardly Wait - The Replacements
Fake Empire - The National
Where The Streets Have No Name - U2
Apocalypse Please - Muse

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Hugo's House of Horrors Computer Game Review


The year was 1988 during the deep recession of the Regan-era, where times were so tight that your girlfriend Penelope decided it was worth 9 dollars an hour to babysit at a house with a dinner party of monsters so monstrous that Dracula would shit his pants. You play the role of Hugo, fresh from spending your last 5 dollars at the thrift store so that you could buy a light blue sweat shirt and purple blue jeans to look sharp for your new adventure game.



Little did you know that there were no babies in this house. In fact the locked door, creepy eyes, human-eating dog, Alex-Trebec-like-old-man-in-a-boat, and crazy mad scientist would be enough to deter most normal people from babysitting at this house, but the truth is that Penelope's attempt to babysit at the house of horrors was more a cry for help than an attempt at an adventure game. You see, Peneplope was so ashamed that she was dating Hugo, considering his lack of fashion sense, his vast knowledge of obscure trivia, his stalker tendencies, and his tiny penis, that she was attempting suicide. Hugo's heroic attempts to save her were little more than the game creator's attempt at trying to make the girl he lusted after in high school fall in love with him 15 years later. If only Stacey Madison played computer games . . .

If you ever feel the urge to relive the pathetic life of recession-ear Hugo, you would be better off opening up MS Paint from your start button, drawing a picture of a house, and emptying your bowels onto your computer monitor.

Tommy Timeline Pt.2


301 BC: Tommy conquers France.
319 BC: Tommy conquers Turkey, Greece, and Egypt!
320 BC: Tommy conquers Afghanistan and Pakistan!
321 BC: Tommy conquers India, securing his title as RULER OF THE WORLD!
321 BC: Tommy ushers the Hellenistic Era, Plays Game Boy Advanced!
322 BC: Tommy doesn't conquer China, but who gives a fuck about China or the rest of the Eastern World in Historical Times? I know Tommy doesn't.
323 BC: Tommy spends 620,865 years in The Hyperbolic Time Chamber. 1701 years pass in the real world. Tommy grows immensely powerful, able to reach Super Tommy at will, even when not fighting Freezaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhlemonadeisrefreshingahhhhhhh.
2001: Hey kid, I'm a computer. Stop all the downloading.
2002: Tommy travels back in time to stop the Library of Alexandretta from being burned down by HOBGOBLINS only to find out that Garfield's Great Adventure is checked out. He then lights the match that sets humankind's development back 1,000 years!
48 BC: Tommy travels back to 2009 only to find out that they haven't invented flying chickens yet. He then burns down the interne

Monday, March 9, 2009

A Big anouncement

Hi all, I hope March madness is leading you to gladness.
I have some super duper news guys. This is bigger than Shaq.
I talked with the fellow senior at my school and his interest was strong.
We are starting a Cindy Lauper cover band to resurrect such wonderful classic rock music for the younger generation to enjoy. Her music is an inspiration to my feminine side, and made me less ashamed of my frequent cross dressing (notice I said only LESS). The roles of singer (taken by yours truly) and piccilo player are filled. We need: a drummer, bassist, guitarist, manager, refreshment provider, and cheer provider. Description of who we need: we only want people who in it to win it, so check your negativity at the door. Must want to move and grove, and bring smiles to everyone's faces. I want to see strong positive powerful attitudes. No prior experience required. Interested in the position, call my business line (don't be intimidated, we're quite lax).

Cheers
P.S. Go Gophers!

Sunday, March 8, 2009

SAT Practice Question

I know you are all studying hard for the SAT coming up next month, so here is a pratice question to help you out. Good luck!

The once a year mating rituals of the Gigolo Ant would suggest that it was a mythical creature created by Benjamin Franklin, but without adequate research we may never know when the ants will wake from hibernation to ruin Thanksgiving with their mating calls.

What is the authors argument in this passage?
a. I like cake.
b. The ghost of Benjamin Franklin has come back from the grave and is cloning robot versions of Rachael Ray.
c. The Walrus uses its thick layer of fat to keep it warm in your grocer's freezer.
d. Batman doesn't love you anymore.