So you're saying you have turned into a bird? I think whomever is spraying you with that hose has replaced the water with LSD because you're not an owl. Owls can't talk or type. The only owl that ever could talk was that owl from King's Quest 5 and he was very annoying and not helpful. Come to think of it, when has any owl ever been helpful. All they do is leave guano on your window sill and argue with cops over parking tickets. And that my friends is how the Grinch stole Christmas.
If you get good grades, Asian baby Jesus might reward with an abstinence manual and Veggie Tales Dvds. Santa Clause is an asshole, so accept any shit from him. He takes the Christ out of Christmas, and Santaclausemas sounds shitty.
Hey kids! This is Jesse the Jungle Owl reminding you to "give a hoot, read your abstinence manual because anyone who scores below an 85 on the Christmas-eve quiz will be required to wear a chastity belt until the age of 21."
I'm saying I feel like a wet bird. I think you're forgetting Archimedes the owl from the Sword and the Stone movie.I'm not worried so much about grades, per se, as just getting my work done, plus finishing up all my PhD applications on time. I've got 4 papers and a Hebrew Essay due on Tuesday, plus 3 applications due on Wednesday. It's not undoable, just a real pain.I'm not worried about the abstinence manual, since I'm well over 21 and thus ineligible for a chastity belt.