Politics: The Bludgeoning
Politics boils down complex social and political issues into their pragmatic utility just like real live politicians. The idea is that you win by out-sleezing your opponent. You win when your opponents approval rating goes to zero or you control enough political offices. Money buys you everything from people to offices to corporate "endorsements" and you manipulate the laws to your advantage.
The first set of the game would focus on spoofing modern American politics. The humor of the game would center upon mocking tropes found within the political scene without being overly topical (I.E. making Anthony Weiner jokes or mocking Bush directly, when the collective unconscious has forgotten about both of these individuals). Later sets could spoof other eras of history, such as antiquity.
The mechanics are thus:
You and your opponent draw 7 cards at the start of each game and start with 50% approval rating. Political offices exist as part of a player’s deck. You may play an office for free, but any player can have a person they control run for an office if they pay the necessary costs. The other player may counter by having one of their people run for office. You win an office by outtalking your opponent, making your opponent’s person leave his cause in shame upon losing an election. People have stats called charisma (power) and dedication (toughness).
Offices are worth a certain amount of points and it takes ten office points to win (arbitrary I might change it). Low offices (E.G. sheriff or mayor) are worth one point. Middle offices (governors and congress people) are worth 2 points. High offices (President or Senator) are worth 3 points. Offices come with additional effects and benefits per the office.
Turn order follows roughly the same rhythm as Magic: Draw, main phase, elections/propaganda, main phase clean up. During the propaganda phase the people you own can attack your opponents approval rating directly through the use of media outlets which you purchase from your hand. You also have to pay to put someone in control of a media source. Media sources have audience factors which boost the charisma of the people who control them. Your opponents can choose to spin and block your propaganda with the people they have in their own media sources.
Also, you have laws both local and global that you can purchase. Local laws function just like auras in magic. They only attach to particular permanents.
Here’s some examples of cards:
Rainbow Coalition- 3 mil
Corporation- non-profit activism
Donates 1 mil to your cause each turn.
If you ever control one race people discard Rainbow Coalition.
Stoned Slacker- 1 Mil
1 Charisma/ 1 dedication
The Dead vote – 2 mil
Gain 2% approval rating for each person in your discard pile
Billionaire Billy - 20 Mil
Donates 10 mil per turn to your cause
Draw 3 cards at the beginning of each turn
10 Char/10 Dedication
Free Billy -4 Mil
Political Maneuver-Knee Jerk (instant (does magic have this copy-righted?))
Prevent all damage dealt to target unique person. Remove all laws attached to that person.
That person gains Political Immunity (Shroud) permanently.