On this, the last day of August, I give to you some away messages I have compiled from my esteemed colleague who will remain nameless in the off chance that he may read this. The punctuation has remained the same as it was when I first recorded these wisdom nuggets. If you don't know who these nuggets (turds) belong to, then I will give you a clue: At parties, he likes to eat mashed potatoes. Alone. In a darkened room.
I was squeezed my anus gland!
Mmm, but it seems to be hard. And, your big head protrudes.
Your buttocks are denfenseless.
I bet you didn't know potatoes were so juicy"
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Joey this is you isn't it, admit it. I knew you were the notorious butt bandit. I always wondered why my ass was so sore whenever you came home.
ReplyDeleteActually, it was me. Sorry Tiz, I used Big Joseph as a cover so that you wouldn't suspect me. That said, I did always leave you a little candy surprise.
ReplyDeleteA Poem . . .
ReplyDeleteNights in White Satin (Jabba's Nightmare Vacation)
I slept on the bench;
please let me go home, you winch.
I saw the shadows and noises
of your son in his bedroom.
He was touching his penis.
It was inappropriate sleepover behavior.
This is why I say
I'm not going with you to Cancun.