Great Designer Search Challenges, Round 2

Some of these were pretty challenging and I'm not sure that the flavorful ideas come across well, but hopefully there are some innovative cards. The design search starts next Monday, so be sure to send forth your last minute design challenges/tips/plates of food.

Make an Adam and Steve card.
Adam and Steve – 1G
Creature – Human Druid - Uncommon
Tap: Target player gains 2 life and put an apple token onto Adam and Steve.
When Adam and Steve have three or more apple tokens on them, sacrifice Adam and Steve and put a 1/1 snake token into play.
2/2

Go to India, ride an elephant, design a card.
Gorilla Elephant Riders – 3GG
Creature-Gorilla-Rare
Trample, haste
If Gorilla Elephant Riders is blocked by any creature with power one or less, sacrifice it.
6/4

Listen to Tangerine by Led Zeppelin, design a card based on the lyrics.
Epic, Inspirational Sunset – 2WU
Instant - Rare
Until end of turn, creatures you control gain vigilance and tap: draw a card.

Design a card around the concept of awkward social situations.
Goblin Slob
Creature – Goblin Warrior - Common
Haste
If you control a non-goblin creature during your upkeep, Goblin Slob gets -1/-0 until end of turn.
3/1

Design a card that dies and comes back like Kenny from South Park. Also give it snow walk.
Chrome Cockroach - 3
Artifact Creature – Insect - Rare
Deathtouch, Snow-covered Swampwalk
During your upkeep if Chrome Cockroach is in your graveyard, you may pay 2B to return it to your hand.
2/2

This is a really tall order, but figure out how to make banding make sense and be more useful.
Stir the Melting Pot – 4BBB
Sorcery-Rare
Sacrifice all creatures you control and put an X/X token into play with trample and B:regenerate where X is equal to the power of all creatures in your graveyard.

Work on your fastball. Design a card afterwards.
Flameburst Dragon – 3RR
Creature-Dragon-Mythic Rare
Flying
When Flameburst Dragon is put into a graveyard from play, each player sacrifices two non-mountain lands.
RR, sacrifice Flameburst Dragon: Deals 4 damage to each creature and each player.
5/4

Escape from Russia by bribing guards with sexual favors and Vadca. Design a card around you harrowing experience.
Seduce – 2W
Instant – Common
Remove target creature you control and target creature you don’t control from the game until end of turn. Those creatures return to play with a +1/+1 counter.

Make a card akin to the great wall of China.
Great Wall of Ahnk – 6WW
Creature – Wall – Rare
Defender
Great Wall of Ahnk may block any number of creatures.
0/12

Design a planeswalker based around the persona or likeness of a modern famous political leader.
The Decider – 3BR
Planeswalker-mythic rare
+1: Target creature gains haste until end of turn.
-3: Destroy all creatures.
-8: Sacrifice any number of creatures you control to put that many 4/4 dragons with haste into play.
4

Make a card around the idea of a hyberbolic time chamber, that places either level up counters on a creature or +1/+1 counters on a creature for every turn its removed from the game.
Hyberbolic Time Chamber - 2
Artifact – Uncommon
2, Tap: Remove target creature you control from the game.
During your upkeep, put a charge counter on Hyberbolic Time Chamber.
2, Sacrifice Hyberbolic Time Chamber: return target creature removed with Hyberbolic Time Chamber to play with a +1/+1 counters for each charge counter on Hyberbolic Time Chamber.

Design a card (preferably a planeswalker) based around Jesus H.W. Christ who died on the cross so that you can eat beanie weenies from Mc'Donald's at low cost. Also, bonus points if make a mechanic around Jesus wagging his finger at you.
Jesus H.W. Christ – 1WW
Planeswalker-mythic rare
+1: put a +1/+1 counter on target creature.
-1: Target creature cannot attack during its controllers next turn.
-4: You get an emblem that says, “Each non-token permanent you control gains Tap: put a 1/1 townsfolk token into play.”
3